On Choosing Champions

By RUBEN D. AROMIN

No man is an island, so goes the saying. Truly, for we are all social beings and we cannot live a happy and fulfilled life by ourselves alone. We have social and emotional needs that have to be filled up. One of these is our need to belong, hence, having our own circle of friends, loved ones, and relatives whose company we cherish and enjoy. And although we cannot choose our kin or relatives, we can at least choose our friends and other people for company. However, we have to be careful in choosing friends and the people whom we go with because there are companions who may ruin our life - companions, who, instead of helping us, will even be the cause and source of our frustration and failure. And the Bible guides us on this matter as it teaches the value of having the right companion:

"Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! … Though one may be overpowered two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." (Eccles. 4:9-10, 12, New International Version)

It is good to have a companion, because "two are better than one." If something happens to us or something goes wrong, our friend or companion can give us a hand or can help. Having a companion is like "a cord of three strands" that "is not quickly broken." On the other hand, pitiful is the condition of someone who has no companion for there is no one to help him when he falls.


Be wary of bad companions
As much as having a companion is good, we must heed this biblical warning in choosing our companion:

"Do not be fooled. Bad companions ruin good character." (I Cor. 15:33, Today's English Version)

Apostle Paul warns us to be careful in the choice of our companion and not allow ourselves to be fooled. There are bad companions out there and they ruin good character. Time and again, this has been proven true by parents who complain of their children displaying a bad behavior or attitude, when this is not what they have taught them at home. They may have gotten this somewhere else from bad companions who have influenced them in a negative way. The Bible cites an example of a bad companion that should be avoided:

"Son, when sinners tempt you, don't give in. Suppose they say, 'Come on; let's find someone to kill! Let's attack some innocent people for the fun of it! … We'll find all kinds of riches and fill our houses with loot! Come and join us, and we'll all share what we steal'. Son, don't go with people like that. Stay away from them. They can't wait to do something bad. They're always ready to kill." (Prov. 1:10-11, 13-16, Ibid.)

Those who tempt or entice others to do evil acts like killing innocent people for the fun of it are certainly bad companions. Drug addicts are usually the perpetrators of such senseless killing, murdering people just for kicks. Those who are into drugs or substance abuse are beside themselves when they commit heinous crimes - they are not normal but evil personified. Unfortunately, there are those whom they have hoodwinked into joining their group because they offer a share of their loot or whatever they can steal from their victims. We should never go with people like that. Instead of keeping company or hanging around with their kind, we should "stay away from them" to avoid becoming like them. As an old adage goes, "Tell me who your friends are and I'll tell you who you are." And parents in this regard have to be aware and wary of the kind of companion their children keep or of the kind of people they associate themselves with. They should know with whom their children spend much of their time and advise them to avoid the company of evil people.


The busybodies
Aside from the evildoers and good-for-nothing individuals, there is another type of people with whom we should not associate because they can also ruin good character. Apostle Paul exposes them this way:

"But we command you, brethren, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you withdraw from every brother who walks disorderly and not according to the tradition which he received from us. … For even when we were with you, we commanded you this: If anyone will not work, neither shall he eat. For we hear that there are some who walk among you in a disorderly manner, not working at all, but are busybodies. … And if anyone does not obey our word in this epistle, note that person and do not keep company with him, that he may be ashamed." (II Thess. 3:6, 10-11, 14, New King James Version)

Apostle Paul commands the Christians to withdraw from those who walk in a disorderly manner. These are the people who refuse to work or are lazy; they are busybodies. Although they are capable of working - they are not physically or mentally challenged -they just simply do not want to work. These people, according to the Bible, are not supposed to eat. They should be noted and be shunned that they may be ashamed. To keep company with such people is to give a wrong signal that they are doing fine and there's nothing wrong with their being indolent. But the more compelling reason why we should avoid their company is for us not to be influenced or infected with their bad habit. Let's keep in mind what the wise King Solomon said: "A lazy person is as bad as someone who is destructive" (Prov. 18:9, TEV).


A friend indeed
With regard to choosing friends, our Lord Jesus Christ should serve as our model. He considers as His true friends those who submit to and follow the commandments of God:

"You are My friends if you do whatever I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for a servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I heard from My Father I have made known to you." (John 15:14-15, NKJV)

Hence, in the same manner, in befriending other people, we must make sure that the friendship will result in obedience to God's will. As such, we must be extra careful in establishing friendship with anyone, because there are companions or friends who may turn out to be bad influences.

A true friend is tested during time of adversities and misfortunes. The Bible says: "A friend loves at all times, And a brother is born for adversity" (Prov. 17:17, Ibid.) and "… a real friend will be more loyal than a brother" (Prov. 18:24, New Century Version). In fact, a true friend is prepared to lay down his life for his friends (John 15:13).

Indeed, one should look for someone whom we can count on through thick and thin and not some fair-weather friend. As the saying goes, a friend in need is a friend indeed. Truly, for "a friend," a genuine friend, "is always loyal" (Prov. 17:17, New Living Translation).


A lifetime partner
If we are to be careful in choosing our friends, the more that we should be in choosing a lifetime partner or a spouse. This is very crucial decision in life that can either mean our fortune or misfortune, joy or sorrow, rise or downfall. Suffice it to say then that in the choice of a lifetime partner, we should find the right person as this is the very principle upon which God instituted marriage:

"Then the LORD God said, 'It is not good for the man to live alone. I will make a suitable companion to help him'. … Then the LORD God made the man fall into a deep sleep, and while he was sleeping, he took out one of the man's ribs and closed up the flesh. He formed a woman out of the rib and brought her to him. Then the man said, 'At last, here is one of my own kind - Bone taken from my bone, and flesh from my flesh. 'Woman' is her name because she was taken out of man'. That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united with his wife, and they become one." (Gen. 2:18, 21-24, TEV)

God instituted marriage to give man the right and suitable companion until death do them part. God gave man the woman as a lifetime companion. He did not create another man as man's suitable companion or spouse. What God has joined together in marriage since the beginning are a man and a woman and not man and another man or woman and another woman. Same gender partnership with its attendant sexual intimacy is a sin before the sight of God. Only the union of a man and a woman is valid and acceptable to God. And the married couples are bound by law until death separates them.

However, even in choosing a lifetime partner, God has strict prohibition. To His chosen people, God said:

"Do not marry any of them, and do not let your children marry any of them, because then they would led your children away from the LORD to worship other gods. If that happens, the LORD will be angry with you and destroy you at once." (Deut. 7:3-4,Ibid.)

God did not want His early people to marry those outside of His nation because they would lead them away from Him. He even charged the parents to not allow their children to intermarry with such people because this would incur His anger with severe punishment as a consequence. And His prohibition on this kind of union persists up to the Christian Era:

"Do not unite in marriage with unbelievers, for what fellowship has righteousness with iniquity? Or what mingling has light with darkness? Or what accord has Christ with Satan? Or what portion has a believer with an unbeliever?" (II Cor. 6:14-15, Lamsa Translation)

Apostle Paul instructs the Christians to not unite in marriage or be engaged with unbelievers. God does not allow the members of the Church of Christ to intermarry with non-members. Because just as there is no harmony between righteousness and iniquity, and light and darkness don't mix, so neither they. Be that as it may, in choosing a lifetime partner, the Book of Proverbs reminds us: "House and land are handed down from parents, but a congenial spouse comes straight from GOD" (Prov. 19:14, The Message)

It will do us well then if, before settling down for a lifetime partner, we consult God through devotional prayers.


The best companion
Although there are numerous benefits to be derived from the company of good people - of family, particularly a congenial spouse, and of friends - and even of the brotherhood of God's chosen in the Church of Christ: "How wonderful it is, how pleasant, for God's people to live together in harmony!" (Ps. 133:1, TEV), still, whose company should we aspire the most to have in our life? Who is the best companion of all and how can we have and enjoy His company? The prophet Micah tells us this:

"He has shown you, O man, what is good; And what does the LORD require of you But to do justly, To love mercy, And to walk humbly with your God?" (Mic. 6:8, NKJV)

God is still the best companion of all. Hence, we have to walk humbly with Him. In His company, we can fully trust that "The LORD's unfailing love and mercy still continue, Fresh as the morning, as sure as the sunrise" (Lam. 3:22-23, TEV).

The early servants of our Lord God could testify to the fact that God's company is second to none. King David testified:
"When I look beside me, I see that there is no one to help me, no one to protect me. No one cares for me. LORD, I cry to you for help; you, LORD, are my protector, you are all I want in this life.

"I call to the LORD for help; I plead with him. I bring him all my complaints; I tell him all my troubles. When I am ready to give up , he knows what I should do …" (Ps. 142:4-5, 1-3, Ibid.)

In King David's experience, when there was no one beside him to help and protect t him, he called to the Lord for His help and protection. When he was on the verge of giving up, it was the Lord God who held him through. It was God's company that kept him consoled during those dark hours of his life.

Besides King David, another servant of God who enjoyed His company was Apostle Paul who testified:

"At my first defense, no one came to my support, but everyone deserted me. May it not be held against them. But the Lord stood at my side and gave me strength, so that through me the message might be fully proclaimed and all the Gentiles might hear it. And I was delivered from the lion's mouth. The Lord will rescue me from every evil attack and will bring me safely to his heavenly kingdom. To him be glory for ever and ever . Amen." (II Tim. 4:16-18, NIV)

Apostle Paul experienced being alone against his enemies, with no one to defend his enemies, with no one to defend or support him. Everyone deserted him but the Lord, who stood by his side and gave him strength. God delivered and rescued him from harm and danger. He was so courageous and was not afraid of any evil because he had God as his companion. He was confident that God would save him and bring him safely to His heavenly abode.


Walking humbly with God
Certainly, if we have God as our companion, nothing can go wrong with us. Apostle John teaches how we can have God's company and walk humbly with Him:

"But if anyone obeys his word, God's love is truly made complete in him. This is how we know we are in him." (I John 2:5, Ibid.)

Obedience to the words or commandments of our Lord God is the key to having Him as our companion in life. His love for us will be made truly complete and we can be certain that we are in Him. Our Lord Jesus Christ, who is in the best position to teach us how we can have God's company, says:

"And He who sent Me is with Me. The Father has not left Me alone, for I always do those things that please Him. " (John 8:29, NKJV)

If we are obedient to the Father, like our Lord Jesus is, and do what pleases Him, He will not abandon and leave us alone. We can then be assured of God's company not only here in this life but most importantly in His heavenly abode come the day of Judgment.


Source: PASUGO GOD’s MESSAGE. April 2009. Volume 61.Number4.ISSN 0116-1636. (Pages 27-30)